I’m kind of over my anger at my old neurologist. Not worth my time, frankly. I had a couple moments last night, where I felt panicky and almost kind of shaky, like I might hyper-ventilate. I don’t know how else to describe it. TMI alert! The diarrhea is an added bonus., not! Nothing really exciting to report, except that my pain isn’t any worse despite not having the “pain” medications that I was used to. Last night was more painful, but today I already loaded the dishwasher, started a load of laundry and went up and down the stairs a couple times (my laundry room is downstairs). Don’t get me wrong, I still have pain and fatigue, but I’m under my heating blanket with my heating pad on my knees and that is helping. One knee is starting to throb, so we’ll see. My new doc also gave me something called suboxycodone that is supposed to help me with the withdrawal symptoms, but you put it under your tongue, wait (forever) for it to dissolve, and although they’ve flavored it with orange, that doesn’t cover the awful taste.
I can honestly say that I haven’t started craving the narcotics, but it is in my brain that it might help my pain if I take them. I am not even going there though. I’ve been trying to distract myself with Facebook and Zynga.com. I’ll probably start reading the new J.R. Ward book that I got from the library even though it is huge and I’ll have to balance it with pillows because it’s too heavy to hold in my hands. I do have a Kindle but it was quicker to get it from the library in book form. Another TMI alert! I’m actually feeling horny! Hasn’t happened in way too long (read: forever to my husband). Am I rambling? Again? What was I talking about?