Fibronaut At Home

It’s a Lovely New Day

on August 28, 2012

one-lovely-blog-award1

It is one o’clock in the afternoon, my blogging time.  I am in ready position.  Hands on the keyboard.  Support under my elbows.  Full of topics to blog about.  Where do I start?  I’ll mention the obvious.  I’m already in pain and I’ve barely typed anything.  It is time for me to eat lunch and take my medicine but I am going to ignore my alarm so I can get this out.

I was nominated by http://painfighter.wordpress.com for the “One Lovely Blog Award”.  Thank you so much for nominating me and for reading and commenting and all the support.  This blog and other bloggers are my support group, which every doctor I see and every book I read says it’s important for Fibro Fighters to have that.

I think that the rest of my post, in which I’m supposed to say seven things about myself, will be free-form and I’m sure I’ll say 7 things about me and that there is a good chance that half of those things will be TMI.

Just yesterday, I started writing in my journal again but am taking a different approach.  I’ve decided to concentrate on the following:

  • Make realistic goals and keep them.
  • From now on, the couch is your last resort.
  • Eat at the table for as long as you can.
  • You have to want to get better, even if what is better is something different than what you used to be.
  • There are no more excuses and no more wasted days.

I then made a separate list of my 5 realistic goals.  These are things that bring me happiness and will help keep me centered.  I will do these every day, whether I do anything else or not.

  1. You will shower every day.
  2. You will do dishes or laundry every day.
  3. You will write five positive things about yourself and your life every day.
  4. You will meditate or do yoga or practice some other relaxation technique every day.
  5. You will hug your kids and kiss your husband every day.

I then decided that I would reward myself with activities I enjoy for doing these basic things.  My neighbor’s daughter has been living with fibromyalgia for 25 years.  She told me not to focus on the pain.  The only way I can do that is to focus on things that I can effect outside of my body.  I’m not going to focus on the things that I can’t do but I am going to enjoy everything that I can.  Instead of being afraid of my body, I’m going to be conscious of what my body is telling me and move on.

I’m waiting to hear from the disability company.  I can’t do anything more to prove to them that I am unable to give the little time that I get during the day that is pain-free to a job.  It is not that I don’t want to work, it is that I cannot.  I am in constant energy-saver mode.  If I do too much, I pay for it, either with pain or with fatigue.

I am done focusing on the pain and the fatigue.  Yes I hurt.  Yes I’m tired.  But I’m alive.  I’m a mother to three beautiful children and a wife to a very sexy, very supportive, uber-awesome husband.  I have focused enough energy on looking back, wishing things were different and hurting for those things that I’ve lost.

Thunder is rumbling in the distance and maybe that’s why I have so many aches today but right now the sun is shining and I am looking ahead to lunch and then to picking my kids up from school and helping them with their homework.  Peace out (imagine two fist-bumps to the chest and then a peace sign)!

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3 responses to “It’s a Lovely New Day

  1. TTD says:

    Wow! A super positive post. You make me feel very humble reading it. Well done you.

    • csgomez79 says:

      Awww. Thanks. I try to read this post every day to remind myself what I need to do and what I need to focus on, especially when the pain and fatigue are bad.

  2. […] I haven’t read beyond this chapter for good reason.  How could a person read this and not be more confused than they were before?  Every type of possible pain relief method is mentioned and they could all work or they might not.  It’s up to the reader to figure this out?  Really?  First you have to find a doctor who is willing to try some of these things.  My pain specialist got me off of the narcotics, which I am very thankful for, but has no other suggestion for me beside yoga.  Really!  I just do yoga every day and I’m all better?  I did yoga yesterday, meditated for a while, but still had little to no energy, still had pain and still couldn’t sleep last night.  Maybe today I’ll try my Leela by Deepak Chopra on the XBOX Kinect.  Life with fibromyalgia really is all trial and error.  Unfortunately, the price for my errors often leaves not only me suffering but my family as well.  Mommy is grumpy/asleep/crying, the kids have to find their own dinner and the hubby gets no loving in any shape or form.  I think the Fibro Response and thyroid are helping with some of the sensitivity and some of the pain but I really need something to give my energy a boost.  Zoning out all morning and falling asleep after the kids get home is okay, if that’s the way it has to be, but there are so many things I could be doing if only I had the energy.  I could even consider going back to work if I didn’t wake up feeling like a Mack truck hit me every morning.  I think I need to re-read my goals/positivity post (It’s a lovely new day). […]

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