Fibronaut At Home

Happy Birthday to me!

on May 4, 2013

Wish me understanding and compassion today.  Social Security wants me to see their doctor to determine whether I am disabled or not.  They picked my Birthday of all days at 9 o’clock in the morning.  I hope they don’t ask me to take my ball cap off.  Today I was going to wash my hair but it is too early for a shower.  My Mom is driving from Denver very early this morning to take me because I don’t/can’t drive this early.  Here is the endless wheel my hampster in my head is on:

– What if I forget to tell him something?  I didn’t write down a list of my complaints because I always freak out and end up not looking at the list.
– What if he is not nice?  Sometimes, when I think I can tell the doctor is ignoring me, I give up.
– What if he doesn’t believe me?  We have all had doctors that look at us like we’re crazy.  I even had one call me crazy.  He tried to laugh like I was going to laugh along!
– What if, what if, what if!

I think I’m going to meditate on the way there just so I don’t hyper-ventilate. 

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