Give Thanks Not Spanks is what I’m calling this weekend. My kids are being kids and I’m not worrying about anything. I want to enjoy my family, eat a lot of good food, watch football, watch any corny T.V. specials that are on and that is it. No mas. I’m not going to worry about laundry, dishes, dirty floors or any other housework related thing. I’m going to do what is necessary and no more.
I’m especially not going to let any of the drama that can be associated with family gatherings touch me. I am a bubble of happiness. I am the unicorn, farting glitter, spreading rainbows wherever she goes. I am making cheesy potatoes and spinach stuffed mushrooms and you can eat them or don’t, because if you don’t, that just means there’s more for me. I am painting my nails in a turkey/thanksgiving theme and maybe my toenails too. That is it. I’ll help clean up after dinner, but that is it.
Kids: If you need something, you better ask your Dad, because I am relaxing this weekend.
Hubby: If you need something, get it yourself.
Just kidding. You can ask me and I might help you out, but only if I was already getting up. Otherwise, refer to the previous note.
And if you thought this post was going to be about the body shapers, Spanx, I’m so sorry to disappoint. I’ve never worn Spanx, nor do I plan to ever wear them in the future, so you’ll have to go somewhere else for any Spanx related hijinks. Although, I’m pretty sure that if you gave someone Spanx on Thanksgiving, they’d probably cross you off their invite list for the next year. So, if you’re invited somewhere and you’d rather not go, give them Spanx. You are welcome.