Fibronaut At Home

Glutton for Gluten-Punishment

When I first went gluten-free I made a joke about not eating chocolate cake in front of me. Well, in the last week, chocolate cake has been under my nose twice and I couldn’t help myself. My three-year-old didn’t want the rest of her cake and I couldn’t let it go to waste. What kind of example would that be? At the same birthday party I also ate a mini turkey sandwich. It wasn’t my fault. There was a little umbrella stuck in each sandwich. They were too cute to resist! I arrived at the party looking six months pregnant and I left looking ready to pop. I should mention that I’m not pregnant, I just can’t get rid of this tummy! I’m not sure if the pain I felt afterwards was from eating the gluten or from driving the 20 minutes to the party and following my three-year-old around a splash-park that she refused to get splashed by. I’m still having bouts of pain even when I don’t have any gluten.

I finally finished preparing my appeal to the disability company, with my hubby’s help. I’ll let you know how that turns out.

I know that walking is supposed to be the most gentle exercise but I hurt so freaking bad after a two-block walk to the library. I didn’t know if I’d make it home I hurt so bad. Now I’m so exhausted that I feel like I’m going to fall asleep. Typing this, there is not a muscle in my legs or arms that isn’t aching.

I was recently given the advice to not think about the pain. Yeah. How am I supposed to do that exactly?

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Duh!

I ate two hot dogs with buns. The buns were made of enriched wheat flour, also known as what I’m not supposed to eat. My hubby says relax and don’t think about being in pain. Forget that your head feels like it’s swelling up and the feeling is slowly moving down your body. Don’t think about all the pain in all your ligaments. First your wrist, then your knees, now your hips, elbows, shoulders. I love hot dogs! Can’t type any more.

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Gluten Intolerance

I haven’t actually been diagnosed, except by my very wonderful acupuncturist, but having been off gluten for a month, I can report that I do feel much better.  If I needed any confirmation, I have it today.  We had dinner at Red Lobster last night and having been shut-down on a gluten-free menu so many times before, I didn’t even ask for it.  I had the maple glazed chicken with wild rice pilaf and broccoli.  This morning, I woke up hurting much worse than usual.  I called Red Lobster, had it confirmed that they do use wheat flour in the glaze but that they have a gluten-free menu that you can ask for.  So, if you’re thinking of going gluten-free, be sure to ask, even if the majority of people look at you like you’re speaking another language.

In the meds front, I’m trying to get off of the suboxone that I’ve been taking to help with the withdrawals and pain associated with addiction to opiates.  Not that I’m an addict.  I haven’t had one craving for my old pain pills, which didn’t help my pain at all.  Thanks to the neurologist that I used to see, as I think I’ve mentioned before, I was on narcotics for no good reason.  He was a jerk, who didn’t believe I was sick, so I’m glad I’m not seeing him anymore.  When I went to my new pain doctor, he explained that someone with fibromyalgia should never be put on narcotics.

My disability company called me yesterday to inform me that they would no longer be paying my claim.  No doctor filled out the work restrictions and there isn’t sufficient evidence to support my claim of fibromyalgia.  First of all, I didn’t diagnose myself, the a fore mentioned douche-bag, I mean, neurologist said that’s what I had.  Second of all, I called my current doctor, I’ll call him Dr. Wonderful, because the combo of him and his nursing staff are the bomb, and they never received the fax requesting work restrictions.  The disability company goes by the national norm for my job, which they consider a sedentary position and they think I can do that.  They don’t look at my specific employer and what they expect of me, which was to do the job of three or four people.  They look at what a loan processor is, probably at a big company, where everyone sits in their cubicle all day.  That was nowhere near what was expected of me, not to mention that doing the job of three people gives you the stress load of three people.

They also called me on a Friday afternoon, to tell me that they’d be mailing me a letter and I could see it then.  I was seeing red at this point, but did call back to ask them to fax it to me.  Reading the letter made me even more mad, especially the comments that the douche-bag, I mean neurologist, made about me walking with my young child.  Not carrying her.  Holding her hand and walking with her.  The ass also said that I always seemed better after the appointments and never seemed fatigued.  Could it be that I was more warmed up and able to move better after having been up and around?  How could he tell me that I needed to exercise and walking was a good exercise and then damn me by saying I was walking better at the end of the appointment?  I do have fatigue!  Every day!  Is he with me 24/7 to see that?  I guess I should’ve cancelled my appointments on my good days and only gone in on my horrible ones!

Lastly, I’m dealing with the shock of the mass-shooting at a theater that I used to go to, in my home-town of Aurora, Colorado.  It is 10 minutes from my Mom’s house and 2 minutes from where I used to work in high school.  The guy lived 5 minutes from my Mom’s house.  I just can’t believe that this would happen.  He killed kids.  My father-in-law wants to take my kids to see Batman today and I want them to go and have fun, but I’m scared.  What if there are copy-cats?  I’ll go see Ice Age with my three-year-old while my hubby and father-in-law take the older kids to Batman, but I’ll be worrying about them the entire time.  I really hope that people don’t judge Aurora or Colorado badly, from this one incident.  I have to point out that this person was from California and was only in Colorado going to college.  I would like anyone reading this to say a prayer for the victims and their families.  Hug your kiddos and loved ones a little tighter, even if it hurts.

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Ouch-ouchitie-ouch-ouch! Ouch! Ouch!

Hope you read the title the way I sing it in my head.  I’m short-posting because of my constant friend Pain.  I’m having the skin-sensitivity where a brush of someone’s hand can feel like a scrape.  My little girl’s feet felt painfully rough (they are smooth) against my legs and just someone leaning against me can feel like they punched me.  I thought I’d feel better in the summer but the constant weather changes (we have a chance of thunderstorms almost every afternoon) and the high temps are making me ache.

 Gluten-free since June 19, 2012.  Pro’s of gluten-free are as follows: eating better, more fruits and veggies, had sex 3 times in one week as opposed to 3 times in 3 months before.  Con’s of gluten-free: I’m really hungry, we have Oreo’s and I can’t eat them, and I’m really hungry.

Gotta go before my sweat runs into the keyboard and I’m replacing another laptop (I orange-juiced my previous laptop in a daze of fibro-fog).  It’s been over 100 degrees for 5 days straight and we only have one window air conditioner.

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Gluten-free for me?

I went to my acupuncturist yesterday and she asked me to try going gluten-free for a month.  She also wants me to cut out as many refined sugars as I can.  The main reason I haven’t tried this before has been the cost.  I can’t justify spending so much just on food for me.  I also don’t want to get my hopes up again, just to have them dashed.  That probably sounds silly but with every new thing a doctor has had me try or  family has told me to try and every failure, I feel more and more discouraged.  I feel like I am at a place of acceptance of my situation and it is scary for me to open my mind to a new treatment.  I’m not sure that will make sense to anyone and I’m not sure if I’m explaining it correctly.  I’m in a flare right now, so the fog is pretty thick.  Even though I slept well last night and remember dreaming, I went back to bed after waking and eating breakfast and I feel like I’m spacing-out all the time.

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